Managing (not fixing) our Communication Anxiety

It’s no secret that Communication Anxiety (we call it Communication Apprehension in the academic space) is an incredibly common challenge. The feelings we get right before we walk into a board room, a meeting, or a professional presentation never leave us doubting our fear. For some people, body temperature rises. For others, that queasy feeling in their stomach is the first sign. Shakiness or increased heart rate are common descriptors.

We’re not surprised to hear that people feel nervous before a speech. But what about when we’re in a lower-stakes situation? Why do we experience similar physical reactions when we are going to dinner with friends or meeting a colleague for coffee? Why do we feel like our knees are wobbly before we speak up in a small department meeting? Why don't some of us seem to be terribly affected by speaking to a crowd of 200 but a one-on-one networking meeting puts us completely on edge?

One of the most prolific researchers in the Communication Studies field, James McCroskey, spent years investigating Communication Apprehension. He described it as the fear of real or anticipated interaction with others. For those with the highest apprehension rates (still a high number of individuals), this occurs even when interacting with, or anticipating interacting with, people they already know. Communication Apprehension rates have been rising steadily in recent decades and the numbers have certainly increased since the Covid-19 pandemic. So we can rest in knowing we are not alone in this experience.

For me, if I am facing any of this uncertainty or wondering why my body is responding in a particular way to a situation, one of the most helpful elements in this research space is the notion that communication apprehension takes many forms. It can increase with any evaluative situation. For some, its highest rates will always be in public speaking contexts. For others, interpersonal or small group interactions carry more weight. Neither experience is wrong or better than the other, but the information about ourselves and our tendencies can be helpful. We have tools and measures that can help us assess the contexts that are most likely to trigger anxiety for us. And as we grow in understanding how our apprehension rates fluctuate across different contexts, we can become more gracious with ourselves. From this place of self-compassion, we stand ready to develop strategies for building communication resilience in face of the fear.